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Yes, There ARE People Who Believe Chocolate Milk Comes From Brown Cows

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Studies are now showing that 7% of all Americans believe chocolate milk comes from brown cows. The study was commissioned and conducted online by the Innovative Center of U.S. Dairy, and while 7% might not seem like a big deal, it is when you realize that percentage means 16.4 million Americans believe this preposterous fact.…

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The Daily Show Opened It’s Own Trump Twitter Library

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The Daily Show opened a great three-day exhibit in New York City right across the street from Trump Tower. It showcased all of President Donald Trump’s most famous tweets. When asked if the presidential library should be opened after his term. The Daily Show host Trevor Noah said: “Yes, that’s true. Unfortunately, we do not know…

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If Every Shakespeare Play Was About Donald Trump, The Titles Would Be Hilarious!

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When New York’s “Shakespeare in the Park” decided to perform the play Julius Caesar this summer, they created a real tempest. (See what I did there?)  Casting a lead actor who looked and dressed like Donald Trump was just too much for the fragile ego of the President, especially because in the play Caesar is done in…

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Journalist Humiliated After Being Caught Looking At Anime Porn

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Vanity Fair editor and journalist Kurt Eichenwald tweeted a photo of some anti-Semitic hate mail he received. He was entangled in a Twitter argument with Fox News anchor Tucker Carlson at the time. In the background on the computer was a shot of a browser tab for a site called “B-Chiku,” which is an example of Japanese anime porn,…

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After Finding A Worm In A Packaged Cucumber, Customer Service Hilarity Ensued

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Wes Metcalfe took on the brave world of customer service departments when he contacted Tesco after finding a worm housed in his packaged cucumber. Now, we all understand the world of customer service can be grueling, unforgiving, and unsympathetic. So, Metcalfe decided to try and tug at the heartstrings of the customer service department by…

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What One Woman Did With Her Amputated Foot

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Kristi Loyall of Oklahoma lost her foot to cancer, but she didn’t lose her lust for life or her sense of humor. Loyall asked the medical staff if she could keep her amputated appendage, and then paid to have it professionally cleaned, sanitized, and wired together. Now her skeletal foot and her leg from the…

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Spanish Men Have Been Asked To Keep Their Knees Together (VIDEO)

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manspread

It turns out that a certain uncomfortable problem on public transport is actually a global phenomenon. Signs on public transport in Madrid, Spain have shown that people have had enough – enough of ‘manspreading.’ In case you do not know, ‘manspreading’ is when a man chooses to sit with their legs wide apart in a…

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DC Bar Hedging Drink Bets On Trump Tweets During Comey Testimony

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A bar in Washington, D.C. is offering free drinks for every time President Donald Trump tweets about former FBI Director James Comey’s highly-anticipated testimony on Thursday morning. The Union Pub says: “This ‘special’ will run til Comey’s testimony is over, or 4pm, whichever is earlier.”  President Donald Trump said that he would likely be live-tweeting…

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Your Grandchildren Are Definitely Going To Need These Products

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Now that the President of the United States has decided to pull out of the Paris Climate Accord, it looks like things are really going to be heating up. In fact, it looks like things may be heating up so much that life as we know will essentially be over. Maybe not for us, but…

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Swedes In Pig Masks Give Whole New Meaning To The Word ‘Porking’

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Insjön, a tiny Swedish hamlet with only 2,000 residents, is the center of a bizarre incident involving pigs, lasers, and the hit game, Pokémon Go. Two teenage boys were playing Pokémon Go, and trying to catch ’em all around 10:30 pm near a local lake when they ran into a couple wearing rubber pig masks. The…

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Just In: Vladimir Putin Is Not a Woman

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Vladimir Putin always has a great day. Always. He is never, ever, off his game. You want to know how this is possible?  The Russian strongman has an answer. Speaking with legendary filmmaker Oliver Stone, Russia’s President made a statement that could have been taken right out of Donald Trump’s own mouth. The two men…

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Trump Is So Toxic Addicts Have Started Calling Meth ‘Donald Trump’

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President Donald Trump is many things. However, his name has now become synonymous with… crystal meth. Donald Trump has become the most popular name for meth since he became president. As Boing Boing reports: “The study found that ‘Trump’ and ‘Donald Trump’ topped the list of most common celebrity code names for meth. In other…

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‘I’m Now The 44th-Best President!’ — Trump Meets Nixon’s Ghost In Epic Simpsons Short

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To commemorate President Donald Trump’s 125th day in office, The Simpsons once again left us hysterically entertained as they lampooned Trump with a new short this Friday. In the short, the premise is that the president is trying to be nice to former FBI Director James Comey. Trump is seen in bed with books surrounding him,…

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This World Leader Built a Pillow Fort In His Official Office

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The CBC, Canadas national broadcasting corporation, ran a competition for the countries children. The prize was to be Prime Minister for the day and entrants had to write about what they would do if they were Prime Minister. The winner, five-year-old Bella, wrote: “As Prime Minster, I would make sure everyone has homes and everyone…

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BuzzFeed Writers Tried $256 Korean Beef – Here’s What They Thought (VIDEO)

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One of BuzzFeed’s many hit series is Worth It, a show that features two guys who try expensive food. We’re not talking about parmesan cheese off the block instead of that cheap little container. Steven Lim and Andrew Ilnyckyj have tried everything from $95 eggs to a $2,500 Secret Menu. Their most recent delicacy was trying $256 Korean beef…

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Best Twitter Rants And Reactions About Trump To Date

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In a political climate that has not simply become eye-bulging, but volatile, there is absolutely no shortage of people expressing their love, and hatred, for the current United States President. Beginning with the first official announcement that President Donald Trump would be seeking election all the way to this beautiful Memorial Day holiday, people from…

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A Woman Marries A Building, Claims To Have Romantic Connection (VIDEO)

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Forty-five-year-old Carol Santa Fe, a native of San Diego, California, is a happily married woman. She has had the same lover for a whopping thirty-six years. According to Carol, the love of her life is the Santa Fe train station. Ever since she was nine-years-old, Carol has been in love with the old building. The…

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Former Speaker John Boehner HILARIOUSLY Explains Why He NEVER Wants To Be President

in Against The Politics/Grab Bag/Life/LOL by

  If you watch President Trump in action, you’d think that everybody in the world must want to have his job. He struts around like the king of the world and Tweets endlessly about all the great things he’s doing. He just loves being King. Or President. He isn’t sure there’s a difference. But not…

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What Was The Fate Of This ‘Utter B*stard Of A Cat?’

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Animal shelters usually write cute and endearing descriptions of their residents, sharing their likes and dislikes and quirks of their personalities. An Austrailian organization, Cats Of Melbourne, is no different, except in the case of “Lord Bigglesworth” where they dropped the cute and endearing part and replaced it with brutally honest and terrifying. According to the…

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Burglar Steals Grandmother’s Security Camera To Cover-Up Embarassment

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The Dunbar Police Department in West Virginia got a call about a daylight robbery on April 23rd. Pretty normal call, right? Wrong. St. Albans resident Tristan Tucker admitted to police that he was responsible for the robbery. His own grandmother told police that her 27-year-old grandson had repeatedly broke into her house. This time Tucker…

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Would You Like A Rat With Your Mocha Latte?

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  Some business ideas are unique and quirky. Some are just plain bizarre. The idea of opening a coffee shop combined with a cat rescue is kind of cute and fun. One such cat cafe opened a few years ago in Oakland, California and has been an enormous success. The owners had the idea of opening a…

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One-Eyed Mammal Is Now A Rockstar In India (VIDEO)

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Miracles are real. They happen every day. However, it is not every day a miracle turns into an object of worship. In the Assam region of India, a goat mother recently gave birth to a baby with one eye and one ear. Local veterinarians did not give the little baby much chance of making it…

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Food As Diplomacy: Will Trump Really Ask The Saudis For McNuggets?

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  President Donald Trump is set to embark on his first overseas trip as the leader of the (ahem) “free world.” The President is scheduled to leave Washington tomorrow, heading first to the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia. He will also visit Israel, and the Vatican, in Italy. He is then supposed to go to Belgium,…

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Nebraska Neighbor From Hell Sent Strippers To His Neighbors Porch

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Douglas Goldsberry may not be worst neighbor ever, but the particular tactic he used to terrify his neighbors is one of the most unique in recorded history. According to police records, Goldsberry, 45, hired erotic dancers to strip on the front porch of a home that belonged to a family that lived across the street. Over…

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Wanna Piss A Guy Off? Just Agree With Him (TWEETS/VIDEO)

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Devils Sidechick

It turns out The Devil’s Sidechick @FeministaJones on Twitter is on to something. She has discovered that nothing makes a man angrier than accepting a compliment from him with a simple ‘Thank You.” The Tweets came like this: Piss a man off today: Tell him you agree with his compliment of you. — TheDevil's Sidechick (@FeministaJones)…

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Florida Crook Tries To Get Off A Drug Bust With Unique Bribe (VIDEO)

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Desperate times call for desperate measures, apparently. One Florida man thought that his own situation was so bad that he tried to bribe a police officer with his favorite fast food. According to Pasco Police officer Joshua Glass, he stopped a driver in a black Honda on Tuesday, May 16th. Upon looking into the driver-side window, Officer…

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New Jersey Teen’s Prom Ride Knocks ‘Em Dead (VIDEO)

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In the average American high school, students have to confront their awkward years along with everyone else. This can lead to some rather interesting results. Of course, cliques, which are more or less wholesome gangs created out of mutual interest or hatred, exist in order to pester those whose awkward years are especially clumsy. However,…

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Take A Dump Like A Trump On One Of These Golden Toilets

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When a series of golden toilets have begun popping up around Indianapolis and Muncie, Indiana nobody was entirely sure what exactly was going on. It was clearly political, each toilet and “Take a Trump!” written on its tanks but who had created and placed the toilets and why was a mystery. Under the lid of each toilet…

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You’ll Never Guess What’s On Sale In Ivanka’s New Book

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Women Who Work: Rewriting the Rules for Success is Ivanka Trump’s newest attempt at empowering women through the art of not really empowering women. Her book, which is fraught with useless and shallow information, is meant for the working woman, but is really a bird’s eye view of the working woman from a penthouse in the…

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Proof That Trump Really Is A Robot

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During the campaign, President Donald Trump’s doctor claimed that Trump would be the “healthiest” person ever elected president. I would like to see that doctor’s diploma. Trump loves fast-food, only sleeps a few hours a night, and he believes exercise is misguided. The reason that he doesn’t exercise is absolutely batsh*t insane. He believes that…

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Spicer Is Hilariously Back On The Comedic Chopping Block (VIDEO)

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Stupidity is overflowing in President Donald Trump’s White House, and among those who can’t get over it is late night comedian, Seth Meyers. The first one was during the daily press briefing of press secretary Sean Spicer. The reporters berated him because he promoted Trump’s border wall, which according to him was now replaced by…

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Trump Has Got The Itchy Finger Again

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Oops, the State Department did it again. In just two weeks, the State department has hit the “delete” button when they received several complaints that they were promoting business endeavors of the Trump family. This time, a State Department agency, the Office of Global Women’s Issues retweeted Ivanka Trump’s tweet about her book. Her original…

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Melania’s No Fur Non-Statement Is About As Trustworthy As Her Husband In A Locker Room

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What I’m about to tell you now will make you laugh. “She [Melania] does not wear fur.” This is a statement from Trump’s East Wing communications director Stephanie Grisham’s email to CNN. Wait, what? I told you this is funny. So apparently, Melania is joining the likes of our former first lady Michelle Obama and…

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New Mystery: What Held Trump On Air Force One For 40 Minutes After Landing?

in Against The Politics/Grab Bag/LOL/WTF by

  As usual, President Donald Trump spent this past weekend away from the White House. As usual, he and his entourage spent their time (and our money) at a Trump property. This time Trump was at one of his golf resorts in New Jersey. The press pool reported that Air Force One got back to Washington…

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Make Sure You Bring Those Hand Wipes Because In This Place STD’s Aren’t Reserved For Intimacy

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Sexually transmitted diseases, or STDs, obviously imply sexual contact. It would seem logical that if you really wanted to get an STD (why would you?), you would first have to have sex. Well, throw logic out of the window, for there are some places where you can get an STD without doing the deed yourself.…

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Trump’s ‘Criminal Aliens’ Hotline Inundated With Reports Of Extraterrestrials (TWEETS)

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When the pretend president signed an executive order back in January to help the victims of all the violent alien criminals marauding across the country he probably wasn’t thinking of Ripley’s nemesis or Spielberg’s cute little E.T. but those are the aliens being reported. On May 3rd the Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE) announced their…

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It Begins: Zombie Fox Attempts A Home Invasion (VIDEO)

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In some movies it begins with a plague outbreak. Others involve voodoo curses or the Book of Revelation. In real life, it may just start with one deranged fox in the Russian town of Usinsk. In a terrifying video, a clearly bloodied fox bites and claws at what appears to be a metal doorstop. Then, just…

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If You’ve Eaten This Candy, You Know What Gunpowder Tastes Like

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Smarties. The pastel candy pellets that taste like someone dumped too much sugar into the Tums machine. Kids love them, parents eat them when there are no other desserts in the house, and idiotic teenagers snort them to show how hardcore they are before their grandmothers pick them up from school. Every single day, more than…

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This Just Might Be The Most Genius Invention All Food Lover Needs

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If you are a food-lover then I know you’ll agree when I say that the biggest hurdle we have to face in cinemas and watching games is that we can’t eat properly. How can we enjoy watching? You hear me, right? We need drinks and food. How can we watch if we’re holding our drink…

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The Inducer Pizza Has An Unusual Side Effect

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Hawthorne’s New York Pizza and Bar in Charlotte, North Carolina has recently seen an uptick in its pregnant clientele. The reason? One of the company’s pizza pies promises to help women to give birth. Apparently, pregnant women believe that consuming the “The Inducer,” which comes with medium-hot Buffalo sauce, mozzarella cheese, and chicken, helps their…

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God Responds To Twitter Bot Eviscerating Joel Osteen’s Tweets (LANGUAGE WARNING)

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One Twitter bot, Joel Dongsteen, takes the tweets of televangelist Joel Osteen and replaces the word “God” with the phrase “your dick.” As Raw Story reported: “The famous Texas pastor with the bright pearly smile may bring thousands to Jesus on his televised church service each Sunday, however, his enlightenment doesn’t come close to some of…

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Russian Navy Tweets Photo Of Beautiful Tabby Cat…In Syrian Battle Zone

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  Since ancient times, cats have been common travelers on ships. The clever little animals are independent, able to feed themselves on the ship’s vermin, and are thought to bring good luck. Ships’ cats were helpful in controlling the rats and mice that often got into the food stores and brought disease to the sailors. And cats…

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AWKWARD! Uber Driver Picks Up Sex Worker That He Mistakes For His Passenger (VIDEO)

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An Australian Uber driver made quite a mistake on a recent shift. The man had obviously been booked to picked up a customer called Chelsea and the dashcam footage showcases the hilarious case of mistaken identity by capturing audio of the whole thing. It begins simply enough. The driver assumes he is picking up his fare…

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INTERNET GOLD — This Is Why Moms Shouldn’t Be Allowed To Text

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Imagine this: you are lounging back in your favorite chair with your pajama pants pulled up above that pooch you don’t want to acknowledge exists as you zone out to your favorite show. Suddenly, your phone vibrates. You sigh deeply, not wanting to outside world to exist in the middle of your worst workweek ever,…

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How Wearing Tutus And Cowboy Hats To The Bar Helped Teach A Lesson On LGBTQ Rights

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When will politicians learn the risk they’re taking when they meet with groups of high school students? Teenagers are way smarter and way more direct than adults think they are. Recently Wyoming’s Republican Senator, Mike Enzi, visited a public middle-high school in Greybull, Wyoming. He was asked what he’s doing to improve the lives of LGBTQ citizens…

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Californian ‘Sisters Of The Valley’ Are The GREENEST Nuns You Will Ever Meet (VIDEO)

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There is an unusual commune of ‘Sisters’ on a farm in Merced, California. This is a place where marijuana is being farmed, processed, smoked, and used to produce various products. While these Sisters of the Valley look like traditional Catholic nuns, don’t be fooled by their headwear. They are actually an anti-religious group who follow pre-Christian…

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Florida Criminal Tries To Hide Drug Stash In The Most Ingenious Way Possible (VIDEO)

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30-year-old Omar Palencia, a resident of Davenport, Florida, had an extremely elaborate plan to smuggle drugs into the United States. According to the Polk County Sheriff’s Department, Palencia invested $600,000 in crystal meth. This meth was then made into a type of “meth paste” that was plastered all over three pieces of pottery that Palencia…

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Nuclear Waste Trenches And Other Official Schematics For Border Wall Designs

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Alright, everyone. The border wall has officially become a thing. Why? Because the Trump administration has already approached over 400 bidding contractors and provided them with an outline of what the border wall design has to include and has asked them to submit their beginning designs. Among the other blustering and asinine requirements, it has…

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