Trump Can Now Only Claim The Dead As Friends

in Against The Politics by

The Donald has lots of international good buddies; it’s just that the friends concerned often don’t know they are such a large part of the PROTUS’s life. Sometimes the friendship is so intense Donald doesn’t even realize his ‘friends’ have been dead for ten years.

When President Business and Italian Prime Minister Paolo Gentiloni held a joint press conference in Washington, our steady source of dark and scary comedic material praised Italy for being “a beacon of artistic and scientific achievement” and for producing artists like “Giuseppe Verdi and Mr. Pavarotti.”

The person who plays at being the president then said that Pavarotti was “a friend of mine, a great friend of mine” but he doesn’t appear to know that this great friend has been dead for a decade.

Trump first met Pavarotti when he hired him to sing at the Mark Etess Arena at his Atlantic City Taj Mahal Casino on November 11, 2000. The king of comb-overs flew his then girlfriend, now First Lady Melania, to the concert on a private jet to the event that sold out even though tickets were $1,000 each.

It turned out that Pavarotti had a cold and was unable to perform to his usual standard causing him to apologize profusely to everyone and offer to come back the next year to perform for free while Trump stormed backstage and demanded that half of the $1.5 million fee be returned because of the ‘lackluster performance.’

True to his word, Pavarotti returned the following year and gave another concert for free, it is just a shame his good friend Donald didn’t bother turning up for it this time.

Unfortunately for the Trumpster, the great tenors’ family have a rather different viewpoint. A family spokesperson asked the Trump team to stop using the singers’ most famous aria, Nessun Dorma, as music at the campaign rallies and said in a statement:

As members of his immediate family, we would like to recall that the values of brotherhood and solidarity which Luciano Pavarotti expressed throughout the course of his artistic career are entirely incompatible with the world view offered by the candidate Donald Trump.

Featured Image Source: Chicago Now

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Featured image via Chicago Now.

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